Cousins Cousins

Talking about Presidents and how some were related to others, we ended up on the topic of incest.

T: I know a dude who went wit his cousin.
Mr. C: How do you know them?
T: Maurice, he went here.
Mr. C: How do you know that?
T: It’s his sister’s baby cousin Stacey.
Mr. C: Are they really cousins?
T: Yeah they cousins cousins. Like come ova yo house and eat stuff out yo fridge cousins. They didn’t know till tha baby came out.
Mr. C: Wow they had a baby?
T: Yeah and his baby got an extra finger, like fo real. No bullshtuff.
Mr. C: So if I see Maurice, I can ask him about having a baby with his cousin.
T: Yeah and ask him about tha finger.

No, I’m black.

In the hall on the way to lunch:
T: (opens door into hallway) Mr. C, are you going downstairs?
Mr. C: Yeah, we are going to lunch.
T: Can you get me some ketchup?
Mr. C: Sure, how many do you want? 2?
T: No, I’m black.
Mr. C: Okay… so 3, 4?
T: Gimme 6.
Mr. C: I’ll get you 7.
T: Okay.

Washin’ dishes, like a thug

2nd Block with 8th Graders:

In the sink after cooking for the day.

Mr. C: Alright so you got the soap here, we have a lot left since you used too much earlier.
J: I know what I’m doin’, I got this.
Mr. C: Alright, then I’m going to let you do your thing.
J: I’m a thug.
Mr. C: Alright, then wash dishes like a thug.


2nd block with 8th graders:

A student takes a liking to my hat.

L: Aw I like this, can I have it?
Mr. C: No.
L: Where you get it?
Mr. C: Chicago.
L: Do I look like I care?
Mr. C: I don’t know, you certainly just asked me where I got it.
L: You look itty today.
Mr. C: What?
L: Itty.
Mr. C: What does that mean?
L: Shitty.
Mr. C: Stop cursing.
J: No shitty aint a curse word.
Mr. C: Yes it is.
D: Nah, it mean “fresh.”
Mr. C: Hmm. Well just use itty I guess.
J: Shitty ain’t a curse, it mean it good. But If I say something like shut up you shitty ass–
Mr. C: Stop. No matter what the context is, you are still using the same word.

You a veggie!

2nd Block with 8th Graders

K: You got sarsages in here?
Mr. C: No, we will never cook with meat in here.
K: Oh I forgot you a veggie.

Fahrenheit 706

2nd Block with 8th Graders:
Mr. C:  Turn to page 706.
J: 706?
Mr. C: Yes.

(A few moments later)

D: What page is we on?
Mr. C: Page 706, I’ve now said that 3 times.
D:  There is no page 706, is you high?
Mr. C: Do you know your numbers? 1 2 3 4 5 6  706.
D: You tryin’ to burn.
Mr. C: I just did.

Cookie Dog

3rd Block with Juniors:
T: I’m hungry.
Mr. C: Me too. That Oreo I got from Dasha helped tide me over though.
T: Uh huh.
Mr. C: Oreo’s are a vegan cookie by the way.
T: No it ain’t, it got dog in it.
Mr. C: You would eat a cookie if it had dog in it?
T: Prolly.