I Want Gauges for Christmas

On the last day before the break, I asked the students about their holiday plans.
———————————————-
Mr. C: Are you going anywhere for Christmas?
D: I don’t know, I just hope I get the things on my list.
Mr. C: What is on your list?
D: ipad 4, xbox 360, game for my Wii, Hip Hop Dance Central, and a cell phone.
Mr. C: That is a lot of stuff!
D: I know, I really want a cell phone.
Mr. C: What kind?
D: Whatever one, as long as its not uh track phone.
Mr. C: I didn’t get a cell phone until I was in college, but then again they weren’t as popular as they are now.
D: Oh and I want umm… gauges. My momma takin’ me to get my gauges.
Mr. C: But your ears are not ready for gauges, that takes years.
D: Nah, I be gettin’ the gauges that make it look like I got gauges.
Mr. C: Well if you get gauges, you can’t go back, your ears will be changed.
D: I don’t want my ears to look nasty, I just want it to look like it.
Mr. C: What’s the point?
D: I don’t know, I just want them. I posted up on facebook the ones I wanted.
Mr. C: Well I guess I’ll see when you come back from the break.
———————————


Stealing Santa’s Sleigh

It’s Christmas time at the school so naturally Santa comes up. This was the end of one of the more interesting conversations:

————————
K: If I had a chance, I swear ta god, I’d steal Santa’s sleigh and ride it around all night. I be goin’ evrywhere. And then I’d bring it back, and say:
“I’m sorry, I’ll be good next year. I don’t want to be on yo naughty list.”
————————


A Justin Bieber Christmas

One of my seniors walked in my room sporting a justin bieber shirt:

Mr. C: “What happened T? Were all of your other shirts dirty?”
T: Blank condescending stare.
Mr. C: “If that was a Christmas present, it’s okay, Christmas is over.”
She left my classroom.
———